Recently, a young person (someone under 60) asked me what a vent window was in a car. I carefully worded the answer so this “kid” would understand me. In my day it was a “cigarette butt disposal portal.” While some of you might be saying its just a “vent,” I beg to differ. For those who don’t know what I am talking about, a vent window was a triangular shaped opening located between the front driver’s window and windshield post. It had a small latch and could be flipped open to provide a breeze on the driver, or passenger, as they were flicking their cigarette butts out onto the side of the road. I do agree that vent windows were not specifically designed to dispose of burning cigarette butts but they did a real good job at it…and I do think that is terrible and irresponsible behavior. Think anyone bought that?
There was a time in this country when almost all adults smoked. I can hear the gasp from those 40 and younger but its true. I remember my parents smoking away in our station wagon as they were transporting our family of 10 somewhere…and nobody reported them to Child Protective Services. Why? Because I don’t think there was a Child Protective Services way back then and if there was, the people working there were doing the same thing. That’s how it worked. Also, I never wore a seat belt or sat in a car seat, because there were none, and I am still alive to talk about it.
This young person’s question got me thinking. What other items that were commonplace as I grew up have gone the way of the Whig Party. (If you had taken social studies or history you would know what that means. Do some research and learn something.) So I started to make a list of things that at one time I could not live without but are no longer in use. No, I didn’t use a pencil and legal pad to make my list, I did it on my phone by just speaking the items I thought of. Take that status quo.
My list started with a whole slew of items that have been replaced by one single item. There was a time when everyone had a Rolodex, paper calendar, typewriter, calculator, answering machine, television, fax machine, camera, cosmetic mirror and telephone books. All of these items, and more, have been replaced by that cell phone you carry everywhere and can’t take your eyes off…WATCH OUT, you’ve swerved into the oncoming lane! Maybe you should pull over to finish reading this article.
It has been said that today’s cell phones are more powerful than the computers that helped put man on the moon. According to a recent TV commercial I saw on my phone, you can get a new phone when you trade in that old one, being held together with duct tape, and sign a new multi year contract locking you into a monthly phone bill the size of the national dept…but look how cool it is to perform your own brain surgery with it. A bit extreme maybe, but that day is coming.
Here are a few other items that many of us thought were going to be there forever but now aren’t. How about telephone booths? Where will Superman change into his costume? Will the British TV show, Doctor Who, get canceled? How will reporters deliver their big scoop to the newspaper without a phone booth to run to? While we’re at it, what happen to all the newspapers? How will Bill and Ted time travel? If you have seen that movie, the elimination of phone booths is probably a good thing.
Thanks to our recent pandemic, toll booths have been vanishing. When head back to Chicago, I use the toll roads to get around. Fine, all I would have to do is pull into a toll booth and pay my fine…I meant fee for use of the road. When the pandemic hit, they shut down all the booths and started taking pictures of the cars plates and it’s the driver’s responsibility to have a fast pass thingy attached to the windshield or go online to pay the toll. What a pain. I went to the site, set up an account with my credit card and just figured it would be taken care of. Nope, six months later I received a bill for the tolls and a fine because they say I didn’t pay my tolls online. Geez! I just drove through Oklahoma and the same thing happened but…ha, ha…I had the receipts of me paying the toll. According to them I only paid half the tolls. Could this be a scam? Where’s Bernstein and Woodruff when you need something investigated? For that person who said “Why don’t you write an investigative article about it,” that’s way too much work. There are naps that need taking.
How many of you folks out there still have a key to open and start your car? Enjoy them while you can. They are quickly being replaced with fobs. No inserting keys and twisting to open your door or fire up the engine. In today’s world you only need to get near your car to have the door unlock. You may also have one of those cars that with a push of a button adjust the seat, steering wheel, mirrors, temperature and radio to your preset desire. I remember when just having an AM radio was a luxury. By the way, you, the driver, may be the next item on my list of what is disappearing. You now can own a car that can drive itself and get into an accident all on its own. One issue, it refuses to take the blame for the mishap and you’re stuck with the higher insurance rates.
We are getting closer to living life as if we were in a Star Trek episode. We already talk to our computers (smart speakers) and scientists are working hard on turning made up science, used to move the plot along, (replicators, transporters and warp drives) into reality. That leads me to one question. How could a society come up with such amazing solutions to so many human problems, and not figure out how to cure baldness. Captain Jean-Luc Picard and I would like to know why.
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